Workshop purpose:

Intimate relationships are one of the most difficult tasks that we face in our adult lives.  They leave us feeling helpless, betrayed, powerful, ecstatic, loved, hated, and everything in between.  Culturally we have no training in what to do with an intimate relationship such, other than from watching and unconsciously mirroring the good, or bad habits of our parents.  A lottery of sorts! 

Relationships have stages, which this course aims to explore from a Creative Couples Work perspective from The Centre for Gender Psychology.

The Dreams and projections of falling in Love

When we fall in love we enter a union of sorts.  We literally physically merge with another human being, assuming the relationship is sexual.  We start talking in we language.  Some couples begin finishing each other’s sentences.  We say things like I cannot live without you.  We will explore what the different genders really want in a partner, and whether we can say anything absolute about this.

Biological differences

Another thing that can be useful to get a grasp on before entering in relationships is the asymmetries in men and women, particularly the ones that are important. 

The female heart is about 25 smaller and lighter than the male heart.  Women tend to have thinner ventricular walls.  Men’s and women’s hearts have a different structural geometry to one another.  Whilst there are clearly physiological reasons for these differences, combining this with our emotionally stylistic differences certainly highlights a level of metaphorical as well as literal asymmetry.  This is just one example of the differences that matter which we will unpack.

Sex & Imagination

This is a topic that is worth approaching with awareness, care, relationality, and tenderness.  It is like playing with fire and it is easy to get burned or to burn others without realising it.  And, of course, it can create new life, and this really does take some consideration and planning from a mature place in us.  Male and female differences will be framed.

Waking up to the nightmare of Bonding patterns

Relationships can be bliss until we start to disagree.  Our unconscious attractions are to do with the fact that we are born vulnerable and dependent on caregivers.  We learn to behave in a way that results in continuing to be loved.  To maintain this, we disown parts of ourselves that are deemed unacceptable and become a diminished version of us as a human being to protect our vulnerability.  The disowned parts do not go away though.  They lie in wait. 

Conscious Conflict

If we can be aware of these dynamics and get curious about ourselves and our partners, we are at an exciting stage.  We can congratulate ourselves!  We have made it this far.  We will explore ways to navigate this stage and learn tools and models to help.

Power & Vulnerability

One of the dualistic dynamics that couples get caught in at this stage of relationship is one of power and vulnerability.    In a monogamous relationship, when one becomes a condescending parent complaining about the mess that is left around the flat, the other becomes a told off child.   The child place is the vulnerable one and the parent is the powerful one.  Being in the vulnerable place is unsustainable, so what eventually happens is that the vulnerable one must make themselves powerful.  Again, more tools to look at how to negotiate and relate adult to adult.

Polarisation and healing

Leaning into conflict can tell you a lot about yourself.  It helps you build character and get to know someone on a completely new level.  If you quit at this point, it would be like the football team who does not have an honest conversation with themselves to get to the next level.  But you must have a vision!  We will look at ways to develop this for yourself. 

Who is it for?

This workshop is open to men and women who are single and want to explore new ways to be in a relationship.  Perhaps because what you have been doing so far has not worked.  Or perhaps you are just feeling nervous about becoming involved with someone new.

Learning outcomes:

The Common results in our trainings are that the men in them:

• Feel more connected to your sense of purpose around relationship

• Feel an increased level of support in their lives

• Have a place where they feel accountable for themselves and their decisions

• Actively explore their relationship with relationships

• Report improvements in their relationships and their experience of competency in them

• Feel a stronger sense of their identity as a man and a woman

• Improve their decision making

• Improve their self-image

• Feel more ease and more prepared for dating

• Learn to understand how to manage disease with meeting someone new

What to expect?

The workshop will be held in-person at the St Patricks Studios and participants will:

• Experience a welcoming environment

• Hear other people’s stories

• Learn some theory that might help regarding relationships

• Learn theory and exercises to help meeting people

• Experience exercises and meditations

• Have time for any questions and interaction with the facilitator

Our approach:

Psychosynthesis as applied to psychotherapy is a unique approach that combines both psychology and spirituality. It is a holistic process that helps the individual deal with patterns of behaviours which inhibit or prevent living life in meaningful and fulfilling ways. It brings us into contact with the life journey to meaning and purpose.

A Gendered perspective promotes realistic change in the everyday lives of men, women and families in areas that really matter, and which are least understood and sometimes hard to manage without informed support. The centre the facilitator trained at is at the cutting edge of researching a full spectrum understanding of gender, relationship, and sexuality.

Ticket price:

We appreciate that each person has their own unique situation, so we invite you to select the price point that feels like it represents a fair contribution for attending this event.

There are three options to choose from when purchasing tickets: £800, £750, £700

Facilitator: Arran Knight

Arran is a BACP-accredited psychosynthesis counsellor.  He holds a postgraduate diploma in psychosynthesis counselling and has completed further training in couples counselling and men’s group facilitation. Alongside his clinical work, Arran trains other counsellors in psychosynthesis and Therapeutic Men’s group work.

Arran is also co-author of ‘The 123 Approach to Fitness’.  He owns a holistic exercises business in central London offering Pilates, Yoga, Calisthenics, and released based approaches.  He has over two decades of experience working in elite ballet and premiership football. 

He is passionate about holism, conversations about cultural identity, and on integration of the body and mind.

Arran has been interested in Men’s Group work as a source of learning and self-development for over a quarter of a century, joining his ongoing Men’s group as a participant in 2001.  He is a Father, likes to learn Greek, and enjoys DIY.